Vaarsuvius/Haley (Part 1)

It had all started when Sir Greenhilt had founded the party. I immediately noticed the rogue he hired, Miss Haley Starshine by name. We elves traditionally are not in the least attracted to a defined gender; androgyny is what "turns us on", as I believe the expression is. Besides, I already had a hife and children at home. But my marriage was arranged by our parents, and Inky (as I was forced to call hir) was not happy with me. Still, elven society forced us to give the impression that we loved one another, and I kept up this deception even out of the elven homeland.

Anyway, Miss Starshine fascinated me strangely. I felt a strange tingling in the region of my crotch, which I had never felt before. Elves have no special organs in that area; they reproduce asexually, by cell mitosis. At least, most elves did. Ever since my two-decade-long puberty at fifty, when I had developed my spellcasting powers, I had noticed a strange cylindrical object protruding from between my legs. I made no mention of it, but when I was older my research told me that it was what the "male" members of the non-androgynous species used to reproduce. This worried me greatly, and finally I resolved to travel the lands, looking for mention of previous elves with this ailment. I joined up with the adventuring party for safety; I had already been accosted by several unsavoury individuals who apparently found me attractive. I was forced to scorch them a little, at which they ran away, half-naked.

I digress. Miss Starshine and I shared a room at the caravanserai which we stayed in that night, for she took me for the only other woman in the group. I explained that elves are androgynous and reproduce asexually, a secret which she promised to keep to herself. There was a mirror on the wall next to my bed, and I caught myself sneaking peeks at Miss Starshine as she undressed. She was beautiful, I thought. I hastily got into bed, trying to banish these treacherous thoughts from my mind.

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