Soon Kim sat at a stone beside the Lake Where The Fishes Take The Bait For Once, bottle in hand. He’d been waiting for years, ing YEARS to at last get at that goblin, guarding the gate, doing the whole good natured paladin stuff. With the luck he got after that, he was seriously considering applying for the Chaotic Neutral afterlife. Miko… what a bitch. Well, her. all of that paladin , thank you very much. He didn’t need any of them now.
“Yah know, my ole friend… ‘Tis just me and you know.” In the mind of the paladin, the bottle nodded and laughed like Dorukan used to… good ol’ Dorukan. He was a decent chap, wasn’t he? If he could just have had his hands off Lirien for one second, he might have been prepared enough to destroy that Bearer of the Crimson Mantle and his lich buddy once and for all. Come to think of it, Dorukan was an idiot.
Spitting into the water, Soon took a deep swig from the Bottle of Extremely Intoxicating but Hangover-Free Wine. Afterlife was quite OK. Why had he bothered with protecting the Rift and staying away from this place if Miko was just to come and muck things up? The Tavern of Infinite One-Night Stands was nice, too. Suddenly, tears swelled in the old paladin’s eyes at the memory of his wife.
“Miko, you hag…” he whispered softly to himself.
“What was that?” A purring voice from behind made Soon jump to his feet, draw his katana and turn around, in the blink of an eye. The old muscles were ready once again for battle…
“Whoa, no need for that. I just wanted to see how you were, my Lord.” Miko’s dark eyes twinkled with the ghost of a smile, as she sat down on a stone next to Soon.
“How did you sneak up on me? You’re wearing platemail, for the sake of the Twelve Gods! And what are you doing here? Your ruined everything… EVERYTHING!” he roared, just for his eyes to fill with tears once again. Sitting down, sheathing his sword, he whispered:
“I’m sorry, Miko Miyazaki. I did not intend to scream at you. You did what you thought was right.”
Gazing wistfully into the water, the old paladin sighed as he felt something rough wind around his wrists. It took a while before he realised he was being bound.
“What are you doing? You’re insane!” Turning around, he saw the obsidian eyes of the ex-paladin, filled with nothing but guilt, sadness, but maybe a tinge of… playfulness? No. This was Miko.
“To begin with, M’lord, you’re full of yourself. Secondly, to answer your question, we’re incorporeal. Thirdly, your anger makes me happy. It shows that you yet have some passion in you; something that I intend to use to its full extent. Lastly, I have eight ranks in Use Rope, so there’s no use trying to wriggle free. Let’s see what we can do about curing those paladin blues, shall we not?”
Resisting for a few seconds, Soon Kim soon relaxed and allowed the seductive ex-paladin to push him into the sweet, soft grass of the Afterlife. After a few seconds, before being completely swept away, he thought:
“This is SO much better than the Tavern they have here…”